Ode To A Gym Teacher

She was a big tough woman the first to come along
That showed me being female meant you still could be strong
And though graduation meant that we had to part
She'll always be a player on the ballfield of my heart

I wrote her name on my notepad
and the ink got on my dress
And I etched it on my locker
and I carved it on my desk

And I painted big red hearts
With her initials on my books
And I never knew till later
Why I got those funny looks

She was a big tough woman the first to come along
That showed me being female meant you still could be strong
And though graduation meant that we had to part
She'll always be a player on the ballfield of my heart

Well, in gym class while the others talked of boys that they loved
I'd be thinking of new aches and pains the teacher had to rub
And while other girls went to the prom I languished by the phone
Calling up and hanging up if I found out she was home

She was a big tough woman the first to come along
That showed me being female meant you still could be strong
And though graduation meant that we had to part
She'll always be a player on the ballfield of my heart

I sang her songs by Johnny Mathis
I gave her everything
A new chain for her whistle,
and daisies in the spring
Some suggestive poems for Christmas
by Miss Edna Millay
And a lacy lacy lacy card
for Valentine's Day

She was a big tough woman the first to come along
That showed me being female meant you still could be strong
And though graduation meant that we had to part
She'll always be a player on the ballfield of my heart

So you just go to any gym class
And you'll be sure to see
One girl who sticks to Teacher
like a leaf sticks to a tree
One girl who runs the errands
and who chases all the balls
One girl who may grow up
to be the gayest of all

She was a big tough woman the first to come along
That showed me being female meant you still could be strong
And though graduation meant that we had to part
She'll always be a player on the ballfield of my heart